“A Database Christmas Carol”
(Sing to the tune of “The Twelve Days of Christmas”)
By Mary Elizabeth McNeely, 2009
On the first day of Christmas,
My true love sent to me
An index that’s a b-tree.
…
On the twelfth day of Christmas,
My true love sent to me
Twelve cache hit ratios,
Eleven time zone patches,
Ten consultants a-sleeping,
Nine sysops dancing,
Eight scripts a-spooling,
Seven users a-squawking,
A six-digit salary demand,
Five function calls,
Four TKPROFs,
Three corrupt blocks,
Two raw devices,
And an index that’s a b-tree!
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